Saturday, July 22, 2006

Finally.

So there I was, like a kambing from a kampung, stepping into my dream University ever since I could remember, the prestigious University Malaya, with no clue of what to expect and hoping against hope that I will not be too disappointed, in a sea of people from various backgrounds, of multitude of attitudes and stuck with thousands of unrecognizable faces.
I pretended I didn't care, I acted cool and nonchalant but in fact, but I was intimidated and I was terrified.
I have to be away from home, for goodness sake, having to make new friends and create brand new impressions all over again.
Since I was thrown into the ocean, I gotta swim!
And the longest week of my life started, Minggu Haluansiswa.
The only thing I could remember was sleeping at the wee hours of the morning and waking up at 5.30 a.m. of which my roomie and I overslept 2 days IN A ROW.
The feeling of waking straight up and seeing that it's startlingly bright outside churns your stomach, I tell you.
We got punished of course.
Ahem.
I remember feeling lethargic all the time, with the various activities happening almost one after the other and I remember walking a lot to the Dewan Tunku Chanselor(DTC) and back, with each trip a 15 minute walk I think? , sometimes having to run all the way there.

And most of all, I remember being awed by the sheer size of students in the DTC, in numerous colours of the colleges, thousands and thousands of us, gathered together, as UM students.
I remember thinking how small I am, in this wave of youngsters, future prime ministers, doctors, professionals, singers, accountants, all so articulate, so different, so raw.
I remember feeling a tingling sensation up my spine.
But that is all tangled up in memories of getting insufficient sleep.

And of course, I was in the sketch too, and though we had to sacrifice sleep to practice, and though we didn't win, but the praises we got, and the friendships made, was well worth it. Sweet.

And oh btw, my group, Group 12, won the best group. LMAO.

Honestly, being in a University isn't all it's cut out to be. Sometimes I feel like I've placed it on so high a pedestal that I ended up being sorely disappointed. Adjustments had to be made immediately for practically all chinese there speak mandarin as their main language, making me feel like an utterly complete fool but they are kind and willing to help a banana like me.
I have to say though that it hurts to actually feel the injustice since you're in the midst of it all, towards STPMers, those who couldn't get what they wanted and those who didn't get anything at all. But that is a sensitive topic. For they advocate the fact that no matter where we come from, we're ONE once we're in.

In a way, that's true as we're on the same level field now, but the field a yard before this field isn't all that level after all, if you get my drift.

Sigh.

I'm coping right now, and I feel better than I did during the first 2 weeks, and I'm grateful.
The only thing I can do is to hope that everything will turn out right for everyone and that pretty soon, we'll be able to settle in, I will be able to settle in.

One day at a time.
One breath at a time.

Hakuna matata, baby!

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

1 minute update

I have 1 minute to do this, as the next batch of people's about to enter the lab for pharmacoinformatics, so here goes. Super short, mind you.

- I'm dead tired.
- Crappy orientation still going on with classes already starting, plus practicals, reports and assignments due every day
- Crappy signature taking from the seniors, with some totally unwilling to give without some humiliation of some sort.
- I've drank air kencing manis so far.
- I've danced.
- I've acted as if I found loads of money and realized they are fake.
- I've modelled.

-I need some sleep.

-I need some familiar faces to pull me out from this rut of self-destruction.

-I shall slowly detail my first few weeks in UM later on.

-I need to go.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Farewell to potty

I am to embark on a brand new journey tomorrow morning. Uncharted territory, treacherous, murderous, unstable.

So drama.

I'm really going off now, for a week? 2 weeks before I come back home? who's to know.

To ma tai is it? or tai ma (big horse) ? lol.

To ye ol' University.

I'm the epitome of mixed emotions. Excited one second, terrified the other, selamba the third and messed-up the fourth. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

Independence has it's own pulling power ( Cousin : UM very the near to Bangsar hor *wink wink* )

But you can bet your last dollar on the fact that I will miss my family so darn much it almost hurts.

I'll try to leave with no expectations, an open heart and an open mind.

Until the moment I find spare time in an old, computer-filled, lighted computer lab, or till the time I'm back home, I bid you,

Adieu,

and Goodnight.

Lots of love,
Me.