Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Random Midnights

I distinctly told my roomie that I vowed to sleep early today.
Here I am, at 1.31 am in the morning, typing this instead of dreaming about lollipops in la-la land.
Tsk tsk.

Lollipops shall wait a moment more for this must get off my chest.

To all whose paths I've crossed these few days;

I know I'm more quiet than I used to,
More preoccupied with the stuff that swirls in my head-mashed and squashed beyond recognition.

I know I'm less patient with frivolity,
Less tolerant of immaturity.

I'm sorry, I really am.

But I'm adjusting to this, this surrounding that surrounds me - the lessons I'm learning.
I'm feeling how to feel this, to sense this and make it work.

Bear with me, brothers, and sisters-
I'm trying to be a better me.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Nothingness

If I were to be completely honest?

I'm pretty terrified at the moment, with the life I'm living.

Granted, I've been in this situation before many times, and I've always thought I could handle it. But this time, it's different. The worst part about it all is this fear that I'm losing the devil-may-care part of me. The part that laughs a lot, jokes a lot, crap a lot.
The part that is seeping slowly out of me, noticeably.

I find myself hurrying, planning, thinking, doing. Lacking in sleep, rest and leisure.

And it shows. To me, at least The serious part of me is emerging, and with it, less smiles and nonsensical thoughts, less dreams and nothingness.

I'm not so sure whether I like this part of me or not.

And that's equally, if not more terrifying.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Finally!

Been tagged many, many times but am always too lazy to get around to do it.
Turning into a new leaf, so yeah..here it is.


Tagged by Miss Tan Ee Von & Mr. Lee Jun Xue!

8 things I'm passionate about :

1) Family & Friends
2) Food, glorious food!
3) Books
4) Music
5) A life well-lived
6) Love
7) Being happy
8) My smelly pillow

8 things I say too often :

1) What the hell?!
2) Wah....liu!
3) I'm good.
4) Yah man.
5) Seriously?!
6) Hungry la wei
7) Wei
8) No problem.

8 books I've read recently :

1) Persuasion by Jane Austen
2) Ellen Foster by Kanye Gibbons
3) MIMS (Go to Google, type MIMS - then you'll know why)
4) The Hours by Michael Cunningham
5) My diary
6) Night by Elie Wiesel
7) The Textbook of Radiopharmacy (gag)
8) The Good Omen by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett

8 songs I could listen to over and over again :

1) Dreaming My Dreams - The Cranberries
2) Lagu Untukmu - Meet Uncle Hussein
3) Landslide - Dixie Chicks
4) Freshmen - The Verve Pipe
5) Kau Ilhamku - Manbai
6) Your Woman - Whitetown
7) Itu Kamu -Estranged
8) When You Believe - Whitney Housten & Mariah Carey

8 things I learnt for the past year :

1) That saying No is not necessarily a bad thing.
2) That you can achieve amazing feats that you thought were impossible. As long as you never give up.
3) Eating a lot = gaining weight
4) Anything can happen in this world of ours.
5) This too, shall pass.
6) Be yourself, trust your instincts and speak from the heart.
7) That I am one hell of a lucky human being. What more to ask for? A loving family, superb friends, good food, enough money to spend, lots of love to go around.
8) Alone time is blissful.

8 people I tag (though I'm sure many would have done it already):

1) Esther Toh!
2) Mai Kai
3) Kenny
4) Felicita!
5) Samuel
6) Jeff
7) You
8) And you.

Friday, July 11, 2008

When diaries are bursting at the seams

When the weight of the world is on your shoulders,
and you feel that your bones can bear no longer;
Just look inside and scan your heart,
Dig deep for passion, that fills-overflowing.

Angels are around to light your way,
Though Dust may yet settle on ground,
When wind blows tender-warm and loving,
Stay still, and breathe-the air is that sweet.

Rejoice, and feel from tip to toe,
Rejoice! For feelings are, when feelings due,
Plod on, plough on, sink deep in the mud
Embracing the feet, swallowing it whole.

Live the moment, regret not one,
Nor half an inch or quarter,
Stay strong, dear mirror, don't loose sight
Never let go without a fight;

The joy my friend
Is in the little things,
That never seem important;

But pause awhile, let heart take over
Counseled by gut, brains of substance;
You won't go wrong, you'll never get lost,
Enjoy the present, Now is here.

A round of love for everyone!